x best betul~

hmm.. x sronok btul rase nye bile kite dah smgt2 nak stat bende yg baru.. tp tibe2 ade bnde x best jadi.. ntah la.. ingat nak simpan je kat dlm ati tp rase mcm dah x tahan nak simpan n just ignore d feeling... so.. biarlah ape yg dituliskan ni sedikit sbyk dpt m'ringankan beban yg ade.. at least itu lah yg dpt dibuat dlm mase t'dkt ni...

x sume bnde ade lah seperti ape yg kite nak.. kte x selalu nye dpat ape yg kite harapkan n kdg2 bnde tu lah yg menguji kite sebenarnye.. n kdg2 kite akan rase iri hati dgn sape2 sahaje yg b'naseb baik dapat ape yg kite nak tu.. tulah name nye rezeki die n bukan rezeki kite.. n mmg akan timbul rase mcm frustrated.. kecewe.. bengang pon ade.. mcm2 lah.. n kdg2 kite asek tanye knape kite selalu dpt naseb yg same? mengeluh je keje.. penat pon ade.. mmg ade rs macm nk giv up pon ade.. tp itu adalah perasaan kite.. n perasaan kite ni mmg x kire tpt n mase... perasaan kite ni is something yg tulus.. die x tipu.. n we cannot fake wat we feel... our feelings never lie to us.. but it is up to us on how we choose to react towards our feelings.. do we want to ignore them? or do we want to acknowledge them? wat i'm doing rite now is i am acknowledging wat i feel.. if i'm sad i'll admit dat i'm sad.. if i'm hepi i'll admit dat i am.. but the hardest part is actually yet to come... dat is to confront with our feelings..

rite now i am unhappy about dis 1 thing.. it mite not be dat big to others but i am quite particular about it.. dis is my challenge.. dis is wer i shud struggle.. i dont have any choice left but to fight against wat i dislike.. to just even think about it made me feel like i dunt want to do it.. but who knows.. it mite turn out into something i cant even imagine.. something good hopefully.. so.. i'm still keeping my hopes dat things will turn around just fine.. n honestly i think dat it will be just fine.. tp 2 la.. perasaan ni kalo lagi di layan2 lagi menjadi2 kan? tp xpe lah.. at least i express it n i move on.. rather than i just keep it n ignore it.. wic is not good 4 me.. n even for anyone.. i mean.. sampai bile kite nak tipu diri kite kan.. kite ni kdg2 xnak admit klemahan kite.. n dat is d major problem.. too ego to admit ur own weaknesses.. tah lah.. x best betul hari 1st posting dah ade rase2 mcm ni.. haha.. its ok.. things will b just fine.. i'allah.. :)